I had a call from my dad's dentist today. They have told me in the past that he has a lot of decay and infection in his mouth and that they should pull his teeth and get him dentures. Today he had the caregiver take him to the dentist because his gums bleed. They told him again that he absolutely needs to have all of his teeth pulled. They are concerned about sepsis. He also has a top and bottom plate but I know teeth keep falling out so those don't always stay in. I'm really not sure at this point if he is maintaining his teeth that well although he says he brushes every day and I have never noticed any kind of odor from his mouth. We have a consult appointment in a couple weeks and I would assume we would meet with an oral surgeon at some point also. I am his guardian so I feel like I should make him do what's best but then I can't force him into having his teeth pulled either.
editing to add - My mom was originally supposed to see a dental surgeon in an unfamiliar town. I was reluctant for her to have surgery due to the anesthesia and also reluctant to travel there, so I started calling dentists to see if any were willing to do a consultation.
Turned out he had several abscesses and needed to have about 10 of the roots removed plus a couple teeth. He went on antibiotics, had about 6 of the roots removed and refused further treatment. He is continuing to have teeth break, but is not at all bothered by it. He still smiles with missing teeth and all.
He already mostly ate softer foods, so continues to eat well.
His dentist is concerned that he at least be monitored for abscesses, but he refuses.
Dad is 90 now, so close in age to your Dad.
The removals were terribly painful for Dad, he may have refused pain medication afterwards and the healing took a long time.
Now, Pops dentures are getting loose and he has been combative when faced with dental appointments. Pops dentist told us that it's very common for elders to refuse to wear new dentures and has strongly suggested we not change pops dentures out because, at this point he's at least wearing them.