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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
If you don't think she'll be safe at night don't bring her home. Or have someone with her all night if you can afford it.
Our elderly parents always want to come home and they swear up and down that things will be fine, that nothing will happen, but accidents do happen. What would it be like if you brought her home and she fell and broke her hip one night? Would she have to lay on the floor until someone came in the next day? If she had LifeAlert around her neck would she remember to push it if she fell and injured herself?
You can't bring her home if she's going to be a danger to herself.
Hi Glostuff, My mom is not in a facility yet. My sister and I rotate on a weekly basis taking care of her in her home. HOWEVER, when it's my week I take mom him with me for the weekend and she constantly tells me she wants to go home. At the beginning I would get so frustrated but now I just tell her "mom, I have things to do and we'll be back to your house Monday morning. She whines but I try not to entertain her whining, just distract her. I know we,will be in the same shoes you are one day and have talked about it amongst us. We have agreed that when mom says she wants to go home we will tell her that the doctors don't want her to because it is not safe in her mom. I know it's easier said then done but we just pray that god gives us the strength to believe we are doing the right thing. Pray with her before you leave her and add a special saying for her. God bless and good luck.
No, don't do it. Spend less time at AL and do not interrupt her time in activities. Go once a week, stay an hour and leave. If you are there too much, she will focus on you instead of socializing. She will become weepy and whiney. Moving her to your house will only make it worse.
I would be very wary of removing a person with dementia from a place where they are being cared for and allowed to stay alone in a house unattended. Think about the risks you are taking. The falls are only part of the problem. She could start a fire, allow strangers in the home, choke, ingest nonfood items. Dementia patients lose their ability to function as an adult. It's like leaving a toddler in a house unattended. Unless you can provide her with around the clock supervision and care, I would seriously consider what it involves.
In case you think she is capable of living alone, then have a professional assessment conducted to see just what she needs. Except in the early stages of dementia, you can't leave them alone at all.
Also consider that many dementia patients who are in their own homes, ask to go home constantly. Sometimes, it's not a physical place they are describing.
If you know she doesn't feel safe in the night then you should appoint someone who care her at night if affordable and otherwise you take help from your relatives so that he/she stay with her.
"I know you want to go home, Mom. Right now, for now, this is where you need to be. The doctors want you to stay here for now. Let's go see what's doing in the game room". Affirmation, therapeutic fibbing, distraction.
No. Her safety is 100% priority. Your sanity is 100% priority. Take my fuzzy math and hone in on the 200%. Mom's AL is the right thing for her, AND the right thing for you. Elderly declining parents become irrationally self-centered, with or without dementia. I hate the toddler analogy, but in this case it's applicable. Lay down the law. Sugarcoat it as much as you need to. But keep Mom where she is.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Our elderly parents always want to come home and they swear up and down that things will be fine, that nothing will happen, but accidents do happen. What would it be like if you brought her home and she fell and broke her hip one night? Would she have to lay on the floor until someone came in the next day? If she had LifeAlert around her neck would she remember to push it if she fell and injured herself?
You can't bring her home if she's going to be a danger to herself.
My mom is not in a facility yet. My sister and I rotate on a weekly basis taking care of her in her home. HOWEVER, when it's my week I take mom him with me for the weekend and she constantly tells me she wants to go home. At the beginning I would get so frustrated but now I just tell her "mom, I have things to do and we'll be back to your house Monday morning. She whines but I try not to entertain her whining, just distract her. I know we,will be in the same shoes you are one day and have talked about it amongst us. We have agreed that when mom says she wants to go home we will tell her that the doctors don't want her to because it is not safe in her mom. I know it's easier said then done but we just pray that god gives us the strength to believe we are doing the right thing. Pray with her before you leave her and add a special saying for her. God bless and good luck.
In case you think she is capable of living alone, then have a professional assessment conducted to see just what she needs. Except in the early stages of dementia, you can't leave them alone at all.
Also consider that many dementia patients who are in their own homes, ask to go home constantly. Sometimes, it's not a physical place they are describing.