Mom has been battling with RA for over 10years. We put her in assisted living last month when her needs became more than my daughter and I could handle. This morning they called an ambulance for her. She was admitted with a UTI and blood clot in each lung. She’s been in pain for so long that I just want her to be at peace. I feel horrible about this.
We all will die one day, to be able to die without pain is something most of us would want for ourselves and our loved ones.
I wonder how many elderly parents have died under someone's watch because the caregiver was worried about hurting their parents feelings. I bet it has happened a lot.
You've done the sensible, most unselfish thing even if you don't know it now. Wanting it to be over is a love feeling not something you should ever feel guilt about. Of course you don't want her to suffer anymore. That's love!
Be at peace with yourself.