My mom has been calling me to tell me she doesn't have any clothes. She actually has two closets full of clothes. She also calls to tell me she can't find any underwear. When she looks in her bureau drawers, she says there is no underwear there. She has been diagnosed with dementia. Is it possible she is seeing the clothes but can't identify them by looking at them?
I have been making small signs even though Mom is on the outer edges of being able to read, and it's helped me from having to spend a frustrating twenty minutes (6x day) discussing her lack of teeth. I hand her the card describing the history of her teeth and dentures (including her decision to never have them relined nor the bottom ones replaced) while I wash her dentures, then she is resigned to reality by the time they are ready to insert. For now, anyway.
So I clean out her closets, and she only has those certain items she liked. It really looked like she had nothing, three pairs of pants, couple of sweatsshirt, and a handful of t-shirts. Then put the other things in boxes or another room. Gradually I'd introduce another item to the closest, about one every two weeks. That way she could feel secure with the new items. Over time I was able to increase her wardrobe from a small hand full to a good amount, it's still not what it was as before.
Something about a closest full of clothes is overwhelming and they can't sort the data in their minds.
I've read that elderly parents need to feel secure because they have no control or lost control one way or another about their lives. This is also true when they want or have to have their purse or wallet even if there's nothing really important inside. They need that security.
Good luck to you.
There are a number of reports and studies of how dementia is experienced. What we do know is that prior to diagnosis, some individuals experience uncertainty about what is causing the difficulty they're experiencing with their thought process. Sometimes questioning a person can lead to emotional reactions of which fear and depression are likely results.
Here are a few of the areas to be aware of:
Awareness as agreement with others.
Don't assume lack of awareness simply because a person has evidence of mental or cognitive impairment. Awareness may vary in it's depth and breadth. Lack of awareness in one area may not mean there is not awareness in other areas.
Variability over time.
Expect considerable variablity in experience and mood over time within individuals. Differing reports on the variances of understanding from the same person over a short period of time, doesn't necessarily mean the reports are not accurate.
Awareness, variability and psychosocial influences.
Be supportive to encourage openess and honesty. People who feel devalued by any questioning, or confused about their own thinking process, may downplay their problems so that they communicate their worthiness, instead of their deficiencies. Remember to also look at a person's history to determine how long any impairment may have been evident.
*If we are to increase understanding and reduce uncertainty experienced by people with dementia, we must fully sink ourselves into dealing with truly understanding what is experienced, and likely take a more thoughtful and challenging approach to dementia.