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Just have to say, Lea guess you have never lived in NJ during the Summer. 😊 Here in SJersey it gets up in the high 90s (has hit 100) and HUMID! To the point you can't breath. Jersey is surrounded by water and here in the South we have swamps. My MIL lived South of Ocala and I said I would never live there because it was like NJ.

Seems Mom already lives in Fla most of the time. So you plan on leaving CT. From NJ to central Fla takes 15 hrs of straight driving with at least one overnight. From Philly to Orlando its almost 3 hrs. Can u get Mom thru security? Can she sit around for 2 hours prior to take off. Is she continent? Can someone go with you?
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lealonnie1 Dec 2022
I grew up in NY JoAnn, FL is NOTHING like the tri state area, sorry.
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It does makes a difference if you are going to Florida too.

Do you want to go to Florida? Is this move just for your mom? Are you staying in NJ? Some people manage their caregiving from far away and others prefer being closer. If you are staying in NJ, will you be able to travel to see her occasionally?

Have you considered assisted living or memory care in NJ?

You mentioned that you don’t like hurricanes. Then don’t go. There will always be hurricanes. I live in Louisiana. We have hurricanes. My uncle moved to New Jersey. My cousins are in Brick, NJ. They have the snow! Take your pick. Snow or hurricanes?
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Florida doesn't have the 'fresh air' and sunshine you think. I thought that myself when I moved my family there in the 80s and it turned out to be a humid bug filled environment where I couldn't go outside for the mosquitoes and sweltering heat factor. Not quite the panacea I'd dreamed up in my mind's eye, unfortunately.

I think your idea, if I'm reading it correctly as Daughterof1930 wrote it out, is a bit too big of an undertaking, to be honest with you. Why not get mom set up in AL or Memory Care AL first, then stay in a hotel nearby for a while to scope out how YOU'D like LIVING there before you make a permanent move. Or, move her to CT into a managed care facility nearby to where you live now, because she does not 'need' to be in FL. It just seems that two big moves would be to much to handle.

Perhaps more details would help, I'm not sure.

Best of luck
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Just trying to clear up—are you saying you and mo would both move to Florida with her in assisted living or memory care and you living nearby independently?
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I am so sorry for the death of your father. I’m sure that you and your mom miss him terribly.

Please know that I understand how much you love your mom. I must tell you that you are considering taking on a huge undertaking.

I cared for my mom with Parkinson’s disease and dementia and it is difficult to do. It gets worse as time goes by.

Have you considered placing your mom in assisted living or memory care? You can visit often and be her advocate.

Best wishes to you and your family.
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