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My husband and I made the decision to move his mother into a skilled nursing facility due to her declining health after a massive stroke and us not being able to meet her caregiving needs any longer. Please no hate; we've prayed long and hard and believe this is the best option for her health/care and for my husband and I.
She will be going to a facility that accepts Medicaid which means she will have a roommate. Are there any items that are absolutely essential to bring with her when she moves in? Her speech therapist suggested a white board listening all her specific limitations (such as not being able to speak) so that there will be no confusion for anyone helping her.
Any ideas are welcome!

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Welcome, Honey! No hate here.

The white board is a great idea.

Is MIL able to communicate by pointing at pictures? Early in her stroke recovery, mom's speech therapist made her a simple book with pictures for bathroom, food, water, pain and a few otbers. Consider that.

My sister in law typed out a btief bio of my mom--who she was, her lines and dislikes (staying up late, getting up late, ice cream, etc) and taped it next to mom's bed.

Bring nothing valuable. Contact the facility laundress directly and ask if they label clothing or want you to do it. Make a detailed of all clothing and iyems that you bring.

Headphones for her TV are useful.
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Honeybee0409 Jan 2022
I would have never thought about the laundry! And she can't communicate through pictures so it's just been a guessing game unfortunately. However, her speech therapist is working with her to get her to that point.
Thanks so much for the tips!
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Yes to everything that BarbBrooklyn noted. My MIL is also on Medicaid in LTC. Although she never had a problem with any roommates, there is always the possibility that she'll get someone who is noisy, so make sure to visit often and at different times of the day to check on her bunkmate. It would be stressful for your mom if she has to listen to yelling or a loud tv, noisy visiting family of roomie, etc. Don't hesitate to advocate for her to admin if there are any concerns.

If she gets first dibs on a spot, see if she can get a view out a window.
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Honeybee0409 Jan 2022
Torally agree on the advocate part! I have been the one handling all of her appointments, finances, etc. since she can't speak anything more than a few stray words. My husband and I found a place only 20 minutes away so it'll be easier with our schedules to visit her often. I think this will let the workers know that she has people who care and will speak up if something doesn't seem right.
Thanks for your suggestions!
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I found that they ignored my notes. So don't put too much on the list. Food dislikes should be directed to the kitchen. Don't expect her hair to be styled so have it cut to an easy style. I left Moms favorite brush and toothpaste. They ignored my note to use them.

Toiletries are probably included as r Depends. I put Moms clothes in sets so she would match. Otherwise the aides just grab the first thing they touch. She won't need a lot of shoes. Mom had 3 pairs, blue, brown and black. Whatever pair was left next to her bed was the pair the next aide put on her. I was looking for those canvas slip ons but she passed before I could find them. Socks, white. They will not match up to the outfit she is wearing. I had a problem with bras being put on. Mom couldn't have skin on skin because she broke out in an awful rash. Daughter explained that aides dress from the top down. Bra's were kept in the drawer with the socks. Daughter said by the time they get to them the top is already on. So, I put the bra on the same hanger as her set of clothes.

As said, take nothing valuable. Ask the laundress what the turnaround is for clothes being washed. Take maybe a weeks supply. I only took clothing for that season. I kept Moms other clothes in under the bed totes since I had no space for her clothing.
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Honeybee0409 Jan 2022
She can dress herself, thankfully! But thanks for the tip on how much of her clothes I should bring
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No matter where my mother went (nursing home, memory care, hospital, then hospice), I sent along a one-page biography of her and requested that all staff who interacted with her read it. I wanted them to know who she was before she eas the person they were seeing. It was important that they knew she was a teacher, a farmer's daughter, an artist, and a librarian. She was extremely active as a volunteer. She'd be married for 66 years until my dad died. She had two children and four grandchildren, and I included all our names (and my contact info).

I also included her limitations. She had macular degeneration and couldn't see faces clearly, so I asked that anyone who addressed her identify themselves when they came in the room and to make an effort not to startle her. She also couldn't hear well, so please enunciate clearly -- not yell.

I never assumed everyone knew -- or needed to know -- her medical specifics. The nurses would read all that on her charts, but humanizing her was vitally important to me. All those places really appreciated having that information, because it lessened the time it would have taken to get to know her. Include some pictures, too, of her and her family.
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Honeybee0409 Jan 2022
I love this!!! Thanks so much for the suggestions :)
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I have to agree with JoAnn. I don't think the aides, particularly as all facilities deal with short staffing, will read a one page summary. White board with a few essentials might have a better chance but I wouldn't bet on it. You might to better to spend the first few days making friends with the CNAs who will care for her. If there is something that will help them remember her limitations, ask them to tell you. Make friends also with the kitchen staff if they come up to take orders even if they do it electronically. If it takes a village to give good care.... become a villager, lol.
Good luck and peace on your journey
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Honeybee0409 Jan 2022
Great ideas! Thank you!!
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