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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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If there is a lot going on, then you need to give more info about that, to get more helpful responses, but per your profile, your Mom is only 63, and unfortunately has heart and post stroke issues, but she is by no means OLD, and unless the stroke has impaired her mental faculties, she should be able to spend her money as she sees fit, and then deal with the consequences!
Heck, I'm 57, and would hate to have any of our 4 kids telling us what to do with our money, as we earned it, right? Just like the fact that at 33-38, we can no longer interfere with their decisions on what to do with theirs!
Now, if your Mom does have some mental impairment, you need to go about this gently, and discuss it with her directly, explaining your concerns regarding her money, and how she needs to budget for her lifetime, and perhaps she would be open to having you help her to set up a budget. Now IF her impairment is severe enough, you may need to go for Guardianship, which isn't an easy process to prove, and can be expensive, but is so important, IF her impairment is significant, but again, you haven't given much information as to advise on that.
It would sure help if you gave more explicit info, as you will not doubt get some great advice on this. Good luck, as I know that you are asking out of Love and Concern of your Moms well being!
You send a letter/fax/email to mom's doctor outlining your concerns. Unless your mom has signed a release for you to be given medical information, the doctor can't talk TO you about mom's conditions, but you CAN give information to the doctor.
Are you afraid that mom will run out of money for her care?
What is "frivolous" in your eyes? Has she done this most of her life? Or is it a new behavior? Can she afford this frivolity? What is her financial status?
Was she recently widowed, or where is her husband?
How do you know she is not telling her doctor important medical information? Can you give us an example?
Is there any evidence at all that Mom may be cognitively impaired?
Your mom is about a decade younger then I. I'm trying to put myself in her place. What if I decide there are certain things I don't want to deal with medically. Should any of my kids be able to sneak behind my back and talk to my medical providers? Umm, no, no I don't think so. I am in my right mind and I am entitled to make my own decisions. Now, if I start developing dementia, that will be a different issue. I would hope the kids I've made my financial and medical POAs would step up in my best interest.
I just bought 3 $40 cake pans. They are lovely. They've already given me a lot of pleasure. I'm a foodie and I love to bake. Many people would consider this a frivolous purchase. They are entitled to their opinion, but they better not try to talk me into agreeing. If any one of my five kids came over and saw the pans and told me how frivolous that use of my money is, I would calmly ask them to leave, and come back when they were ready to respect me as an adult. This is easy for me to say, because I can't imagine it every happening.
So my most essential question is, do you have some reason to suspect Mother is not in her right mind? If not, I guess I don't see that what she spends her money on or what she tells her doctors is any of your business. I don't mean that unkindly. I'm sure that your heart is in the right place and you want only the best for your mother. But looking at it from the mother's side of things, I think you risk damaging your relationship if you don't proceed very carefully.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Heck, I'm 57, and would hate to have any of our 4 kids telling us what to do with our money, as we earned it, right? Just like the fact that at 33-38, we can no longer interfere with their decisions on what to do with theirs!
Now, if your Mom does have some mental impairment, you need to go about this gently, and discuss it with her directly, explaining your concerns regarding her money, and how she needs to budget for her lifetime, and perhaps she would be open to having you help her to set up a budget. Now IF her impairment is severe enough, you may need to go for Guardianship, which isn't an easy process to prove, and can be expensive, but is so important, IF her impairment is significant, but again, you haven't given much information as to advise on that.
It would sure help if you gave more explicit info, as you will not doubt get some great advice on this. Good luck, as I know that you are asking out of Love and Concern of your Moms well being!
Are you afraid that mom will run out of money for her care?
Was she recently widowed, or where is her husband?
How do you know she is not telling her doctor important medical information? Can you give us an example?
Is there any evidence at all that Mom may be cognitively impaired?
Your mom is about a decade younger then I. I'm trying to put myself in her place. What if I decide there are certain things I don't want to deal with medically. Should any of my kids be able to sneak behind my back and talk to my medical providers? Umm, no, no I don't think so. I am in my right mind and I am entitled to make my own decisions. Now, if I start developing dementia, that will be a different issue. I would hope the kids I've made my financial and medical POAs would step up in my best interest.
I just bought 3 $40 cake pans. They are lovely. They've already given me a lot of pleasure. I'm a foodie and I love to bake. Many people would consider this a frivolous purchase. They are entitled to their opinion, but they better not try to talk me into agreeing. If any one of my five kids came over and saw the pans and told me how frivolous that use of my money is, I would calmly ask them to leave, and come back when they were ready to respect me as an adult. This is easy for me to say, because I can't imagine it every happening.
So my most essential question is, do you have some reason to suspect Mother is not in her right mind? If not, I guess I don't see that what she spends her money on or what she tells her doctors is any of your business. I don't mean that unkindly. I'm sure that your heart is in the right place and you want only the best for your mother. But looking at it from the mother's side of things, I think you risk damaging your relationship if you don't proceed very carefully.