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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
What kind of doctor is she seeing? I might write up a description of her behavior and symptoms and give it to the doctor in advance, so he understands what you are dealing with. Some patients seem to do quite well on the day they see the doctor, but if he has the heads up, he can know how to better access her. This might help him in determining what kind of care she needs, such as with bathing, dressing, meals, medication, etc. Describe all the things she needs help with.
It sounds like she is resisting care with her refusal to take meds. That is not uncommon with dementia. Does she wander? Would she likely walk away from the facility? The doctor can state if she's at risk of wandering and perhaps prescribe it.
Do you have an idea of where you would like to have her placed? If so, I might meet with the director to see if they offer what she will need and costs. I would caution you about helping her pay.
I might check with legal counsel in your state to see if you have any obligation to pay for her care. If not, you might just use her income and see what services she might qualify for. Some states have financial assistance for long term care for people with disabilities like dementia. You certainly can pay for her care, but I would get an opinion from an Elder Law attorney about the repercussions and if it's advisable. I would try to avoid using your money and then it disqualifying her for some services.
If the doctor tells her that she needs to go to a place where she can get help, maybe, she'll listen. If not....it's uphill. You can talk to the attorney about legal proceedings if it gets to that point. There are ways to be appointed Guardian, but I would try to do it other ways first.
My cousin's doctor told her that she needed Assisted Living and although she didn't like it, we finally convinced her to go to get REHAB, which is what we called it. It was actually an Assisted Living facility. We explained that she needed physical therapy, nutrition assistance, medication management and help with her memory. She agreed to go to work on those things, but of course, she soon forgot why she was there or that she had a home.
Also, I later had to place her in a Secure Memory Care unit. If her needs are indeed too great for Assisted Living a Memory Care facility or nursing home may be required.
I hope things work out for you. I know it's so stressful.
She has been diagnosed as early stages of dementia but has has gotten significantly worse since then. We see her doctor this week. We do have a medical POA. She has lived with us since age 66, which we have loved. She along with our help can afford assisted living. She wants no part of in home care. This wonderful loving women is not the same person. She's lost a great deal of weight, won't let us minister her MEDS and won't communicate with his. She sees us as the enemy and blames us for things that didn't even happen. She is on an antidepressant/anti-anxiety medication. Hope this helps.
Since she needs 24-hour care it seems like she would qualify for nursing home care. Most people aren't excited about making this move, however once they do move and are settled, if the nursing home is a quality one many adjust well over time and even enjoy themselves.
You might want to seek the advice of a social worker at the facility that you're considering. Take care of yourself, too. This is hard on everyone. Carol
Can you give more details about the situation, such as the degree of her dementia, has the doctor diagnosed her with dementia, does she have a Durable POA or does she have a guardian, what is her medical condition, does she live alone, can she afford private pay for care, etc.?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It sounds like she is resisting care with her refusal to take meds. That is not uncommon with dementia. Does she wander? Would she likely walk away from the facility? The doctor can state if she's at risk of wandering and perhaps prescribe it.
Do you have an idea of where you would like to have her placed? If so, I might meet with the director to see if they offer what she will need and costs. I would caution you about helping her pay.
I might check with legal counsel in your state to see if you have any obligation to pay for her care. If not, you might just use her income and see what services she might qualify for. Some states have financial assistance for long term care for people with disabilities like dementia. You certainly can pay for her care, but I would get an opinion from an Elder Law attorney about the repercussions and if it's advisable. I would try to avoid using your money and then it disqualifying her for some services.
If the doctor tells her that she needs to go to a place where she can get help, maybe, she'll listen. If not....it's uphill. You can talk to the attorney about legal proceedings if it gets to that point. There are ways to be appointed Guardian, but I would try to do it other ways first.
My cousin's doctor told her that she needed Assisted Living and although she didn't like it, we finally convinced her to go to get REHAB, which is what we called it. It was actually an Assisted Living facility. We explained that she needed physical therapy, nutrition assistance, medication management and help with her memory. She agreed to go to work on those things, but of course, she soon forgot why she was there or that she had a home.
Also, I later had to place her in a Secure Memory Care unit. If her needs are indeed too great for Assisted Living a Memory Care facility or nursing home may be required.
I hope things work out for you. I know it's so stressful.
You might want to seek the advice of a social worker at the facility that you're considering.
Take care of yourself, too. This is hard on everyone.
Carol