Follow
Share

To make a long story short. What would be a fair amount for a single parent to pay for in home care? Someone who lives there 24/7 no days off. Parent pays all utilites and her own insurance. Care givers are paying for all groceries, gas, transportation to doctor's appts etc. Care givers also paying clothing and diapers for parent. Thank you.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
The paying for utilities is a good start, but that is only fair so long as the parent is 100% able to take care of themselves and is merely sharing the cost of room and board (and unless your utilities are astronomical they were getting a bargain). As soon as caregiving becomes part of the picture everything changes, but it is hard to draw the line between what you may have normally been expected to do as a loving child and what goes beyond that. I would start by making a concise list of everything you do in a typical day/week/month, then affix a price to it, $25/hr seems a nice number. It is unlikely you can seek payment retroactively, but if you draw up a caregiver contract you can start getting what is fair for the work, just as  your mother would have to pay someone else to do if not for you. And why ever are you using your own money to pay for her supplies, is she destitute?
Oh, and use mom's money to hire in extra help when needed and to pay for respite so you can have a holiday. One of our forum regulars once said that our parents worked hard and saved their money for a rainy day, it's time everybody realizes that it's pouring!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

My husband and I care for my mom, stage 7 Alzheimer's, in our home. We do not get paid, not does she pay rent, but my step dad covers the cost of anything she needs, like doctors, pads, wheel chair, etc. We pay for food but she doesn't eat much.

I don't know what a fair price would be. I can say that no amount of money would tempt me to do this job, only love for my mom....I guess that means it is priceless ;-)
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Mom has dementia, and we are not just roommates. We literally do everything for her. Many years ago, in her right mind she begged never put her in a home, just come live with her. Yes she was pretty destitute until we moved in. Her SS was her only income. So it was not pouring here. Mom needs full time care. We managed to get her some widow pension through the VA but the only reason she gets a great part of that amount is they figured in caregiver wages. If she did not get that, again she could not afford to make it on her own if she was even able to. When medicare and her supplemental insurance takes up over 1/3 of her ss income. That does not leave much to live on. Thing is, mom had made me POA without me knowing, long before when she was of clear thinking. We had thought about buying her house but she just said it is you kid's when I am gone. She didn't realize should she go to a nursing home it would be gone. We have put money into it to make it more energy efficient. New custom windows etc. New door and had insulation in the attic etc. We finally sought out legal advice on should she ever need nursing home care, because she is unable to walk or breaks a hip or something, how would we go about getting the money out of it we personally put into it. The attorney immediately asked mom if she was of clear thinking several times, at which that point she was. He again asked how long we had been her full time caregivers, and under our state law we fell into the category the house is in our name as well without chance of loss should she need nursing home care. I told my siblings we would make it right with them. So what is fair? We are the ones who have given our entire lives to her care. Everything. What is that worth.? I was hoping not have to give the long story, but guess it was inevitable. I have had countless people tell me I should not worry about giving them anything. Had we put her in a nursing home 3 or 4 years ago, the money from the house would have already been exhausted. Ok, hope I have made the scenario clearer. I love my family and they will be all I have when mom is gone. But on the second note, they have not contributed to her care or lively hood. Just want lay persons thoughts on this. I have had legal and professional, and just want other people's opinions in our position and siblings to give some feedback. Thank you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I think the problem is that you aren't really asking about being paid, you are looking to justify the transfer of the house, your mother's only asset, into your names in lieu of payment. If mom already signed the papers then it is no longer her asset and will not be part of her estate, were your sibs not aware of this at the time it happened? Whether or not it is fair depends on the value of the house as compared to what you may have reasonable asked her to pay you through the years. You can skew the figures to justify any amount, but keeping it reasonable will give both you and your sibs a truer picture.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I am just a little confused...are the caregivers the children? I think that most children caring for their parents do not get paid. But I feel if the parent can afford it, they should pay something. The amount will probably never be what is "fair" for the job being done.

If you are looking at hiring caregivers for 24/7 in home care through an agency, the cost in my area is $15-$35 per hour.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Yes, the care givers are only 1 of 3 children. One and her spouse. What makes it fair to the caregivers, when the other two are not helping. Hope that answers your question on confusion grammyteacher. No days off, and on going for over 6 years. This includes meals, laundry, meds, bathroom assistance, peri care, you get where I am going. We do not know what it is to do anything with just the two of us. Just in your opinion is fair compensation if any.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter