The only way to stop my mom from driving is to disable to the car. What's the best way to do this? My inclination is put a club wheel lock on it. I really don't want to mess around with the battery connections. The problem with the club is she will see it right off, which set up an immediate nuclear war. But she's in her 90s, just took a tumble down the stairs, is leaving rehab soon after recovering from multiple fractures, and seems more forgetful now. I have to act. How have you dealt with this?
Are there carburetors anymore? Whatever you do, let Mom see that its broke then "take it to the shop". Which means take it somewhere else, out of sight out of mind. My neighbor had to take her Moms keys away. But they left the car at her house. So she saw it every day and wanted to know why she couldn't drive it. Finally they brought it to their house.
I'm in custody of my grandma's car and she doesn't live with me but she has the idea that she may end up driving again. She can't even really get up herself anymore since her hip fracture and she has confusion spells due to blockages in her arteries. She's not driving that sucker again, I will not allow it. But it's good that you're being proactive because not only could your mom hurt herself, but she could hurt/kill someone else too.
If anything, you could try giving her the wrong keys so that it won't fit/turn in the ignition and chalk it up that the ignition must be broken and it needs repair.
Other options are to remove the fuses. If it is an older car remove the distributor or remove the spark plugs.
Or call your mechanic and ask them to stop by and disable it for you.
Why not use a therapeutic fib? “Lose” the keys. Maybe rehab could lose the keys? Otherwise the club wheel lock sounds like a good idea.
We took my mother's keys; and then told her she could not drive anymore and took the car. In my state, actually a doctor would have had to say that and we did eventually get her doctor to say it but we stopped her driving first.
I actually told her in front of the doctor during the discussion, that "If you promise to only kill yourself, I am okay with you driving. But I am afraid you will kill a young woman with 2 kids in the car.".
since she is at rehab, talk to the doctor without her present to make sure doctor is on board and get him to confirm she is not safe to drive. You still have to take the keys or she might try anyway.
I applaud your efforts, there are too many people driving past their physical and mental ability to do so. It is tough to act on this but necessary. I just got lucky with my FIL; with my prodding, he agreed to let us sell the car. He did not want to admit he could not drive anymore...he never did say that but he did give up the car.
Good luck
Driving a car is not a right; it's a privilege. That's why they call them "driving privileges". More and more accidents involving old people are happening. If you do not feel comfortable getting in the car with your own mother behind the wheel then why are you subjecting others to her driving? Get her on an errand schedule that is convenient for you. Sell the car while it still has value. Put that money aside for her caregiving expenses, which are only going to increase.
The facilitator of one of the support groups I go to had a switch installed under the dash that would disable the car. When she pulled the car in she would flip the switch and the car would not start unless that switch was moved again. She had her mechanic install it.
If the car is in a garage can you remove the remote so the garage door does not open?
If the car is outside chocks could be placed by each wheel this would prevent the car from easily being moved even with the car running and in drive it takes a lot to move a vehicle if the wheels do not move easily.
If this is her car and she will not be driving again you could do:
remove it from the property, tell her it is in for repairs,
sell it if you legally can.
tell her that your car is in for repairs and you have to "borrow" hers.
Simply taking away a drivers license will not prevent a person from driving. People drive without a license all the time.
Then, explain to your mom that it's the doctor's professional medical decision based on her medical condition, and also explain that if she drives and has an accident, even a minor fender bender, then she could lose every single asset she has, every single penny, because anyone else who is hurt can sue her, and, also, her auto insurance company will not honor any claim by her.
Then, either take away all the car keys, or move the car to where you live, assuming that you do not live together.
Went through this with my mother. In her case, I didn't even ask; the discharge doctor at rehab just did it.....wrote down that she was not authorized to drive. And then, when she complained to her PCP, her PCP said she would have to take a special test, neurological and driving, at a well-known memory care testing facility in order to try to get permission to drive again.
She had me, and home health caregivers, to drive her car for her, so eventually she adjusted. But, it was not easy.