I have been here before, and we are doing better, but I am feeling alone in alot of ways. He, my husband, hardly ever talks, doesn't touch me, comes to bed way after I fall asleep, etc. I go to work, come home and tend to daily things and then there pops up a day or incident that makes me blow up about feeling alone and doing it all. Yes, there are support groups, but they meet while I am at work. I cannot attend them. I do have a group, but how do you tend to your own self and not feel alone????? I get out, garden, tend to a dog, have friends, but at home-----?????
I feel for all of you who are isolated and maybe there should be a radio show devoted to carers who are having our sort of problems. Take care everyone.
One problem I have is that I have so much to do here, working and taking care of the things around the house. At the same time I have the need to get out and be with people. Often my own work goes ignored because I need to get out. I think of how much better it would be if I had my own family about to keep me company so I wouldn't have to go out looking for someone to talk to. I don't need a lot of people about, but living alone in this house of despair is more than I can bear every day.
People talk about how rewarding elder care is. I mainly see it as lonely and depressing. I wish things were different, but it is what it is. I just try to stay happy, no matter what I'm doing. Sometimes that works. Other times I just get angry that it has come down to this.
This IS the hardest thing most of us will ever face.
You can't make someone care if they really don't, but sometimes you can make them grasp the consequence of their failure to help and failure to deal with reality. I wish they could feel the impact of your raw emotion that you have so cogently expressed...
I'd print off this thread and mail it to them, probably anonymously, as who cares if they know which one is you or not.
And I'm so sorry you are one of the many who get dumped on. There ARE families who pull together, maybe not without conflict but together; its just that not as many of those folks need to vent on here as badly as those of us who are only children or might as well be.