How can I report my mother in law for hoarding without getting evicted myself?

Your hubby needs to get a new job. He's becoming her slave, seriously. There's no rental agreement, so she can throw you out at will. You are powerless to intervene in her life, and your baby will be taken if he comes home to the current situation, different floor or not. I'm the child of a hoarder, and they manipulate situations to make other people their possessions too. You are next. Run.

And you're bringing a baby home to this?

I would report this BEFORE the baby is born.

Has your husband been designated as her Power of Attorney?

Has she been evaluated by a geriatric psychiatrist?

In your shoes, I would talk to your doc (the OB who is going to deliver the baby) and ask her/his advice. S/he may be able to put you in touch with a social worker at the hospital/social services who can handle this situation.

You need to get this sorted. You REALLY don't want your baby taken away by Child Protective Services because your husband is pussy footing around his mom.

Being sole heir doesn't mean anything as far as making decisions for hubby's mom. Why are the two of you not working? You will have a baby, so not the time for you to go to work, obviously, but hubby? Do you really want to bring a baby into this mess?

Crispy - you said: "She invited us to move in to help with her business and around the house..."

Do you think you two can use this as leverage to get her to agree to some cleaning up? Your husband can tell her, sure, we can help you with xyz, but we need to tidy up a bit.

Does she know you two can't afford to move out? If not, she doesn't need to know. Your husband can tell her that his new baby can't live in a place with so much clutter and threaten to take her up on her threat to throw you out.

Maybe different terms may work. Don't say you will dispose of her stuff, just tell her they will be in boxes. Then later throw the boxes out.

MIL sure has some mental issues. Very hard to deal with for sure. If nothing can be done, keep to your floor, don't take the new baby anywhere near her.

I think that you need to stop being scared and trust that social services is going to treat you guys as the responsible adults in this situation.

You have below described animal feces and maggots and non functioning plumbing. This house is a health hazard and you have recognized this, and yes, the county should now be brought in. Some have said below that this is how she wants to live and it is not your business, but the truth is that this is not legal, and that guardians would be appointed for her if the county was aware of these conditions. This could be due to dementia and age, or it could be mental illness, but in any case it is not a situation anyone should be living in simply because it is unsafe. That said, you must find your own housing as you cannot bring a child into this. Apply for section 8 at once and perhaps pregnancy and impending birth can bump you up in that system; I have utterly no idea how it works at all. I shudder to think of you homeless with a baby, but it is time to reach out to social workers for yourselves and to find safe minimal housing for YOUR family, then address your mother-in-law's conditions, and I agree with others that it is her son who must do this. A new baby and no home will be sufficient for you to deal with. Yikes. I hope you will update us.

Okay, I walked into my moms house when her husband went in for surgery and I just about died. The only drain in the house that worked was the bath tub, the toilet had to be plunged until you broke a sweat and they were using bowls in other sinks to wash dishes and brush teeth. Dog crap behind and under furniture, a path through all this filth. I was informed that she can live anyway she chooses as long as everyone is consenting adults, nothing could be done. Having a new born in the house would have changed things.

I called plumber's in and got quotes to fix the problems, hired it done, replaced the toilet, I hired an old childhood friend to replace the drywall that needed to be removed to replace the old cast iron pipes that were corroded closed, I cleaned up the dog crap and then used 5 gallons of vinegar to get rid of the smell.

She was mad and she fought me tooth and nail. I wasn't having any part of this is okay. As she pitched a fit I cleaned, for 6 weeks I cleaned. For 6 weeks she threw a fit and brought 90% of the junk back in and I kept getting it out the door. That got items cleaned and aired.

I never finished her house, but I was able to finish the kitchen, bathroom and bedroom where her husband would be sleeping, he had part of his colon removed and I knew he would die if that pigsty didn't get dealt with.

As she was tearing me a new one, I just repeated that "no one in their right mind could live like this and if the state comes in they will haul you away, because they don't let people that are a danger to themselves live free!" That wasn't true, but she didn't know that and I was not going to leave that house as it was.

You knew what you were getting into before you moved in, so you are in a bit of a tough spot. However, you can clean up the filth and when she is jabbering at you hold your ground and say I am going to clean this up, if you throw us out, fine, but I won't be going anywhere until I am done cleaning up this place, it's the least I can do since you have allowed us to live here. Keep cleaning, you will eventually make a dent.

Don't force her to get rid of things, obviously animal waste needs to go, but not her stuff. Get boxes and sharpie markers and organize the stuff. Then when you are done she can pull it all out and clutter up again, but you will know that it is at least clean underneath and not sitting in waste.

You can't ask her to pay to clean up what bothers you. It didn't/doesn't bother her, she's not going to pay for you to feel better about her home. You and your husband are going to have to bite the bullet and clean up yourselves or find a new address.
Yes, she offered her home but you guys accepted. Or she asked and you guys said yes. So you have to do what it takes to get it cleaned, she should not be told she has to pay. That puts a stop right now.

Please tell me that the 81 year old has not been given the upstairs as her space.

As hard as it is, it is her home and house. She has the right to live as she chooses, but as her family you should step in and get this taken care of. Gloves, aprons and masks will protect you and if it is specially gross your husband needs to deal with it.

Good luck and remember, as we age it gets harder and harder to care for a large home, she is 81, give her the understanding of that.

Whose idea was it to move in? MIL's, DH's, or yours? What was the reason?

If you want this to be better for everyone, then you need to report her to APS so that they force a clean out.

Alternatively, you need to get her an involuntary psychiatric evaluation.

Call her bluff. What are they going to say when they see the filth.

I personally would say, you do that, they need to see this and get it on record.

I don't think living in fear is good for your baby.

Time to start cleaning up and let her call. You telling them that you are getting this place cleaned up to welcome your baby is not going to get you kicked out.

If you are both working why can't you find a small place or a trailer. It's crazy that you guys won't do what is needed, either clean the house or move.